add yet another issue to my file

do you ever feel like everyone is judging you?
i do on a very regular basis- maybe that makes me a narcissist or just paranoid. i am not sure but i wish you'd quit looking at me like that!

N recently started at the learning center of the college i teach at. it seems like it is going to work out pretty well for him, but i am not sure about me. the woman in charge is one of those people who seems super sweet and is really soft spoken and smiley and basically just meant to hang out with the kiddos because her adult social skills are a bit off. i think she is a judger. each time we speak, i feel like she wants to laugh at me for being such an idiot parent. i said that N was excited to come and has never been in a group setting. "mmmmhmmm" she mumbled with a sly smile and a nod while i heard "oh so i suppose you think you've been a good substitute for my impeccable learning cener, organized play and unlimited access to creative explorations".
seriously- she was thinking that- i just know these things. i am kind of a mind reading ninja.

it went on and on. for everything i said, she had an imaginary and silent retort for me. and so by the time i left our second meeting, she was on my list. BUT the center is great! and the teachers are great! and N is gonna love it- but that lady..... i just know she hates me.

well.
thursday was his first day. he was "pumped". his words, not mine :) he had a great day, i think. according to his teachers, he was the only one who didn't take a nap. he used the bathroom 17 times (it is a novelty with its short little toilet and sink). he was unhappy that his new best friend Bryan wouldn't share his dinosaur but he was happy with his day. he didn't want to come home. lady in charge gave me a sideways glance and acted shocked when i told her that N usually doesn't nap until 2 or 3 so again, i felt judged. it is tough work being such a crazy perfectionist.

and then there was today. i stopped in after my class just to see how things were going though i expected to leave and run some errands before coming back for him. BUT he wanted to come home since my mom was at our house. i wasn't going to tell him "no you have to stay at school" when the awesomeness that is his nana was hanging out at his house wating to shower him with fun and affection. so i took him out. apparently they don't like it when you remove them before the super special lunch comes. but seriously, why care?? i already paid for a whole day so let's not freak about having one less little person around for the afternoon. i mean, in the very least, we opened up the bathroom a bit for others to use. SHE gave me another one of those little faces and though i avoided showing her where N got his backtalking skills from, we did hightail it out of there.

and then it came to me suddenly on the drive home that though i marked NONE in the "allergy" section of his enrollment forms, N does in fact have a significant allergy issue with cow's milk! and by significant, i mean that he has been known to have his eyes swell shut.... that would certainly result in a frantic call to the incompetent parent who would have to pretend to be appalled and freaked out and sad to leave my job to retrieve the invalid. it gets better very fast so don't think i am being insensitive to his plight but honestly, HOW did i leave that off?? i guess we are just so used to giving him goat or rice or almond milk that it never occurred to me that other people kinda get theirs from a cow... especially in a daycare type environment. failure by me. point for ms. hannegan of the learning center.

we make it home. we play, we eat. we nap. we eat. we argue. we play outside. a good day overall and then....

and then, of course, N falls face freaking first into the ridiculous rock grotto that the previous owners built in our backyard (and that we haven't been able to pull from our yard lest we lose a bumper off our car or break a sledge hammer or something). he has a HUGE mark on his cheek and some new scratches. good thing it is almost a week until N has to make another appearance at school, or the meanish, super-nice faced, childlike voice lady would have me arrested for abuse.

and then who would buy my poor kid goat milk?

so maybe that is a topic we should broach

I may have mentioned that I am schooled (for a thousand years) as a chiropractor and practice VERY part-time out the house. I am grateful for the education and point of view and it is great to be able to help my family and friends on the spot, but sometimes I forget that I am not just a mommy. As if there is such a thing as "just" a mommy.

My children don't get adjusted nearly enough unlike my husband who is a chiropractic junkie in need of a sudden fix. It usually occurs right after i have crawled into my cozy bed for the night...
It is my job, you know? I mean, it is a lifestyle too and since I end up working practically free most of the time, maybe I should refer to it as a hobby, but it is still my job. Most of you try not to take work home, I am sure, but mine is always here for better or for worse.
Anyway, so I don't work on my kids enough, I simply don't think about it. Usually only if they get sick do I realize I have neglected them and try to put their little bods back together. BUT, the times that i do, N LOVES it- he asks me to adjust him all the time like a little daddy-in-training and he wants to adjust me too. This involves me face down on the table with some blocks under my pelvis as he runs around the table lifting my legs up in turn and then pulling my head side to side making "crich crich" sounds :) It is pretty funny. I have even been known to encourage because at least I get a pseudo back scratch and if I am lucky, he might even walk on me! The chiropractor is usually the one who needs the work the most but we can't reach ourselves.

Then today I got a surprise adjustment.... to my butt. It turns out that maybe I should explain how we don't randomly adjust other people's behinds. To him, it is nothing because one of the best adjustments for a sick kid is to the sacrum- you know, that triangle shaped bone that dips down the butt crack?? I have adjusted next to that butt crack since he was born, but when your four year old almost sticks his thumb up your heiny, it takes on a totally different tone! Maybe now I know why our play date mom  insists that her son not play "doctor"---- I just thought she was worried that someday I would grab her kid and adjust him cause I thought he needed it (of course I would never do that) but now I worry that N has done this before. A "butt adjustment" out of context may be a little shocking.....

Additional fun fact: Apparently you can spell heiny is several ways and all are acceptable though none are in the dictionary (or spell check :) You're welcome.

Loves and Loathes: Edition Uno

I love being out and about on a Friday night- whether it be date night or just having the family with me to run errands and grab some dinner, it doesn't matter. I love it! It makes the weekend feel soooo much longer. So here I sit totally rested (bahahahahaha) on a sunny Saturday and I can hardly believe we still have the entire weekend ahead of us. Last night we went to Target and Whole Foods (and Old Navy where I got in on the infamous tank sale one day early cause I am kind of a big deal- or a facebook fan, whatever) and we ate at O'Charleys where I also love because the kids eat gloriously free- chicken, macaroni and cheese, broccoli that never came but i didn't complain because their dinner was free.... wondrous. It was a strategic coupon trip and though I am by no means a super couponer, you can get some seriously sweet deals at those two places because they accept a store coupon in addition to an outside coupon on all their items. That got me some $.44 salad dressing, $.50 lotion, $.35 kids band-aids, etc. But you know when it doesn't work?? When the super slow and old check out guy looks straight at you and you hold a stack of coupons up and he hits total without scanning then...... yeah not so great! So one of my loathes is definitely marching to customer service so that the pissed off  sad "customer service" rep can fix the mistake. She was not nice at all and it was not my fault, but I am sorry Target- not going to waste my $14 in savings- if it was just a few dollars, maybe, but I had to do it out of principle.

So while I am on it, I loathe crabby people. I know I know, right? I tend to fall on the crabby side on "occasion"- I prefer to think of my moodiness as multifaceted personality disorder- not multiple personalities, but varied enough to keep it interesting. I totally just made up a new psych term- look for it soon. Okay digression (another love) over. Crabby people- especially those you are trying to pay. A and I just went for an early morning walk- no one else is awake so I thought we'd just take a stroll and see if there were any good garage sales and grab some fruit at the Farmer's Market (ooh ahh we can walk to the farmer's market). Well there weren't and the market was closed for business because we were 15 minutes early...... that's right country folks- don't wait on the little blond girl over there pushing a baby stroller- she is EARLY! I was just walking through and this lady sitting behind her little table said "starts at 8". So we walked away- would it have been a travesty that money was handed over, veggies selected, smiles exchanged- yes because around these parts, the market doesn't open until 8....

But we are home now and N is up and I love Saturday breakfasts though I should probably get a plan and cook something now that 3/4 of us are up- the other 1/4 probably won't roll out till 10- it was a late night of online gaming (I know.... dork ;). Maybe some English Muffins and eggs--- oooo maybe eggs benedict..... that sounds lovely. I will make sure to post it at Dr-Momma Gourmet. We will also be attending a barbq today so it sounds like a good eating day overall.

So there- some loves and loathes on a Saturday.
Hope you all have a supremely great weekend!

Received a letter from Commerce Bank this morning which said "your account has been overdrawn in the amount of $ .29 for over 45 days now"
                  Note: I haven't banked with them for over 3 years except for my malpractice insurance that comes out every three months, so I never check mail from them (I know that is probably not the best idea, but I have other pressing matters to worry about).... PLUS I supposedly have overdraft protection  (in the form of a backup credit card) to avoid this situation.

"As a result of our unsatisfactory relationship, your account will be closed on 3/27/11"
Well thanks commerce, you have saved me the trouble! I hope that HUGE balance doesn't put your bank under.... maybe you should be more worried about people foreclosing on huge homes and/or not paying their car loans.

$ .29?!?!
I hope they can use the 30 cents in change I just sent them and buy some customer service.....