Friday, June 29, 2012

i'm gonna need you to repeat that, just to make sure i got all the wrongness correct in my head...

we are confined to the house, or at least an air-conditioned replacement locale. and as the children are, well, children, they need a constant source of entertainment to avoid behavior that makes me want to poke my eyes out.

i have been wanting to try out storytelling hour at the library for quite awhile. BUT it is on fridays and i almost always work on fridays so we haven't been yet, until today.
i live in a very small town, part hoosierville, part 'burb so though there is access to slews of artistic peoples, i wasn't sure if said peoples would make the drive to our little slice of errr... heaven. basically i didn't know what to expect so i just took N.
we rolled in and there were just a few other parents there and apparently there IS a major storyteller there every week, complete with an activity and abounding fun!! que my excitement!

except that applies to all other days but today.
wa wa wa waaaaaaahhh... :/

i picked the day where a very quiet librarian sat on the floor and just plain read. a very socially awkward librarian at that.
with no activity.
N just sorta looked at me like i was drunk at 10am and climbed on my lap to listen.

and wouldn't you know, we knew the people sitting next to us (small town, remember)... a very sad little toddler who wanted to be anywhere but there and his very well meaning grandmother. the little dude whimpered and cried through two books as i nodded in internal agreement with his misery and then grandma decided to take him out.

all the other mothers smiled in sympathy as she drug him out of the door, because seriously, TWO. who hasn't been there. and then suddenly, miss socially awkward librarian had to divulge that she had in fact never been there. and she said it.

"my children never did that"


really lady? never? your children never cried because they didn't want to do something when they were two years old? give me a freaking break! and if by some crazy remote chance, they really never did, it was certainly because they had your sparkling personality and had nothing exciting to share...

[crickets] sorry.

i feel kinship with mothers of all types, except for the self-righteous ones who get me a little worked up. unfortunately she didn't even realize that what she said was ridiculous and demeaning.
so she continued.

"i'm just lucky i guess"

yes, you are that lady. lucky that i don't send my little ninja up to roundhouse kick that boring book out of your hand and spice up this storytelling hour! good thing i have such good manners and that N and i have worked out when it is acceptable to kung-fu panda someone, which as he knows is only if "vampires or other bad people" are around. but take note dear librarian, next time we may counter your social awkwardness with some of our own.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

art show- we're all going to the aaartshow

you know what i love? my kids. and art. and my mom.

i love many many other things too, of course, but last weekend in the midst of a whirlwind trip to my hometown and visits with rarely seen friends, nephews and sister-in-laws, we took a little foray to an arts faire.

it was hot.
and the kids were a bit crazy, A wanting out, out, out of the stroller that i had to purchase at kmart on the way there because, hello... i was not going to be chasing that little chickie all over the place and my normal and relatively expensive stroller had been run over by a car.
(by my car actually. whoops. i am impatient and couldn't spare the two seconds it would have taken to move it out from in front of the car when i moved it into the garage in the middle of a raging hail storm. i am also too impatient for punctuation and sentences of reasonable length in case you haven't noticed)
i feel compelled to whine too that i wanted to by a good stroller if i had to buy one at all and couldn't because i was on the way to the art fair and kmart's "good" strollers were all boxed up with some assembly required. i figured any assembly at all was too much to accomplish while driving my vehicle to the faire so i went with a cheapie umbrella stroller. in case you care, which you probably don't, but anyway...

it was hot.
and a bit busy, but they had beautiful art and hands-on projects and it took no time at all for N to decide he wanted to learn how to be a master potter. mom and i agreed it did look like a fun hobby, though we are likely colored by demi moore's experiences in Ghost. i mean, wow. patrick swayze and clay and eternal love is all a winning combination. there was no patrick or demi, but there was a sweet lady with lots of patience and N came out of there with a great souveneir.

after the wheel, we moved to printmaking because we are just so artistic and know about things like that. you haven't lived until you help two impatient kiddos "printmake" without getting paint all over. you also haven't lived unless you have eaten an entire bag of art faire kettlecorn. i have lived.

then, because it was hot and i am stupid, i agreed to let the kids run in the fountains. i removed their shoes and for some reason didn't think that we would have any issues. suddenly the fountain sprayed higher and caught A by surprise and one look at a wet little sister was all it took for N to start running THROUGH every spout. within 20 seconds, both were soaked to the bone with little regard to the fact that we were headed out to lunch with my grandpa.

such is life. it was hot and i love those kids.

one day you'll regret this...

this time, if i refer to the balminess outside as 113 degrees, it won't be an exaggeration!
it is hotttt :/ and for those of us without a pool to park our backsides in, that means holing up in the air conditioning and letting the sibling drama unfold.
today i have come to terms with parenting observation #611- that these kids cannot keep their damn hands off of each other. i am flashing forward to car trips with preteens in all their "i'm not touching you" while pointing finger a millimeter from the other's face style glory. N carries A around the house whether she wants it or not, drops her onto pillows and couches, "steam rolls" her, pinches, pokes and claims "you're okay girl, it's fine."
and i guess he's right.
until she turns into the 5'10" model we think she's going to be and kicks his heiney.
enjoy it now N- the time is flyin'

Monday, June 25, 2012

all you need is love... and a hose

and i said to myself, "self- what's with the lack of posting?"
i need to drag my drawers back to the blogosphere before these children grow up without proper documenatation! <------ that is my favorite typo in awhile so it is staying.

we have been so busy with a week of family and friends and more family and more friends from far and wide. i heart summer, even though it will be 102 here tomorrow and i still look pastey and visibly cringe at the words bathing and suit. but they never seem to notice any of those things ;)

pass me that sprinkler

Friday, June 15, 2012

playas gonna play

Sometimes after a super fantastic playdate, you have leftover lemonade, and crazy straws.
It turns out if you combine equal parts of said lemonade with top-shelf gin and sprite, you also have summer in a glass, or bliss. You decide

It will also help with any leftover headaches from too much awesomeness and/or screaming, whichever :)

Yesterday was a truly grand playdate day with some of my favorite ladies and their most adorable babydolls. We had 10 kids here and 10,000 laughs and I hope it doesn't take us as many years to do it again.