steppin out sunday: thank goodness there is sunshine on the horizon edition

the Lord has heard my prayer. happy weather day today :) it was GLORIOUS outside today with sunshine and warmth and little raining happy faces. our little day out was determined before we made it out of our pajamas. i am a bit ashamed to say that our churchgoing has taken a hit because ohmygosh the maniac children don't sit still for even one reading and really ramp it up for the dance party that is a worship song. i am still cringing from last time. but anyway- we will try again soon and i will try not to run down the aisle with the wine. so today (obviously) we didn't make it.

in unrelated news, i have really been craving a cheeseburger. couple that with the random bout of piss-me-royally-off-because-i-was-sick-last-weekend-too PUKING all friday night and i am sure my facebook family thinks we are expecting a new little bean. i think not. so anyway, my sexy husband drove me to Red Robin Yum, straightaway today and we had some luscious slabs of greasy beautifulness and bottomless steak fries. It should tide me over a few weeks through the usual poultry diet until my next beef attack.

so happy :) and they didn't even eat the guacamole bacon burger like meeeeee

and then we went to the park. an amazing gem of a park, complete with working animal farm, 4 ponds, walking trails and a playground straight from preschool fantasy world. A was absolutely freaking out with the horsies and cows and piggies oh my. she was jabbering up a storm with brilliant baby phrases. N was hopping from animal to stranger asking 14 zillion questions and claiming the chickens were speaking a foreign language, which of course they were. it was tops.

and THEN folks. then we stopped for S&J's and the day was complete. this place serves nothing but shaved ice and custard, including a deliciously genius concoction of both that really might be able to negotiate world peace. what the world needs now, is not love, but a large cup of grape shaved ice and creamy custard, topped with whipped cream. the end.

passed out!

Black and White and Wet All Over

This picture is my very first ever entry in The Paper Mama's Black and White Photo Challenge :)

it is so cold! maybe it just seems that way because earlier in the week it was an amazing 60+ degrees, but nevertheless- cold. we are stir crazy. ready for park days and walks and even swimming. but for now we have to settle for bathtime partytime. if you close your eyes it is just like the beach...

at least to them :)

What will I do when they are too big to bathe together??

Big brother is such a big help with the water spitting and all...

Save water- shower with a friend.

how different life could have been...

The following was written as a prompt from Write On Edge for the word "mentor"

he sat hurriedly scribbling his umpteenth report.
late.
there was always somewhere to be. always someone on hold. always a life to save.
or to change. he had changed my life.

i was leaving that day after 6 weeks of learning, excitedly headed home with my boyfriend to lazy summer days and sleeping past 5 am. to the life of an over-driven college student who was burned the hell out.

before him, i had a very clear picture of what my future looked like. sterile, bright rooms filled with sterile, bright tools and people who needed fixed. i was to be a surgeon.
period.

no one questioned the fierceness, the endless studying, the crazy anticipation of every exam, every grade. not until i questioned it over the course of that life-changing summer.

he was god-like with lives in his hands all day, every day. compassionate but professional. methodical but approachable. he was everything i had thought i'd want to be. but he and his team had families. faceless names that they hurried to in the dark, kissed goodbye while they still lay dreaming in the morning. doubtlessly beautiful children with voids where one of their parents could have been.

a great price comes with greatness. and that is, that those who love you the most, have to share you.
all day, every day.
it was a life he could graciously handle. a life that i could not. when i pictured my future, not only was i in an operating room. i was also nursing a baby with beautiful curls. i was fixing my husband dinner and picking laughing kids up from school.

i was not him after all.
it took 6 weeks of seeing true miracles played out in 18 hour workdays but slowly i realized that to be him that i looked up to with such awe, i would have to forfeit the type of mother that i also very much wanted to be.

so there, on my last day, i shook his hand and thanked him for the opportunity, because wow. it had been quite an opportunity. and as he was racing out to save another life, i simply couldn't find words to thank him for how he'd changed mine. so i just smiled and nodded, turned around and closed the door on that path.
thanks doc. i like to think you saved my children's lives too, in a much different way.

mini little me

My darling girl- my wish for you is that your feet are very selective if they choose to walk in my footsteps. On that path you will find that there are no perfect people or perfect lives, but sometimes there are perfect days, and they make the walk worth it.

This sunny day was one of them. I long for its warmth.

here comes the rain

motherhood is not all sunshine and roses.
there are sunny, flower filled days for sure. and they far outweigh the torrential rainfall of tantrum induced tears and the shear stress of rearing miniature humans.

but if i'm being honest, some days it is hard to focus on the happy because the hard is just so obvious. when you are ridiculously sick from spending three days covered in the snot and tears of your sick kids and haven't had any sleep all week for the same reason. when all you want to do is sleep off the funk and the kids still need fed and bathed and played with... yeah, then.

today is a stormy mom day. and damnit, if i could just sleep all day, the sun of tomorrow would probably peak out a little sooner. but i know that can't happen so i guess it's a good thing flowers need rain with their sun if they are going to blossom. maybe my little people flowers need it too.

Magic Moments Monday--- where has this tradition gone??

The air is crisp against our waxy skin, hands painfully cold in the wind and we are smiling. Running, giggling (eventually whining) in the winter sunshine. You've got to scoop up the days like this when you can because the weather forecast is bleak and spring will not be springing for awhile.

The Museum of Transportation is dead in the winter. There were three other cars in the entire parking lot and it couldn't have been better. Well unless it was that empty and 70 degrees and someone was paying us to play amongst the trains. That would probably have been better.

 I haven't Magic Moment Mondayed in quite awhile and I'm not sure why. Maybe I'm bringing it back. Yes. I think I am. Just remind me next Monday, mmkay?

Me- Jeans: Old Navy // Shoes (see above): Target // Jacket and Pullover: North Face //
Sunglasses: Inspired Shades (D&G fantasticness)
PS- N is rocking Yo Gabba Gabba Vans ftw ;)

A fashion post this is not. It is winter and we were outside so the attire is what it is. But we did step out so I am linking up (an eensy bit late) with The Haps because I'd really like to make it a habit. Put that on my reminder list too please and thank you...

February Ten on Ten: It is neither the tenth nor contains ten- discuss

For being part of the Ten on Ten Project this is a pretty poor showing. There are not ten photos and today is not the tenth... I was clicking away on Friday and then all of a sudden life got in the way... or I left my camera in the car and it was 700 degrees below zero out and the kids were crazy and I was hungry and sleep deprived and too lazy to go out and rescue the poor thing. Or something.

Anyway- I started it. Points for me.

6:45 Minion #1

6:45 Minion #2- In my bed, stretched HORIZONTALLY across the pillows :/

Later:

Whatcha looking at crazy chicken?!?!

And Then Some... Happy February All!

paging my rich and long lost relative!

i guess i can sorta maybe admit that i might on occasion when absolutely unavoidable spend too much money... can you sense the reluctant admittance. that is the first step to all self-help programs, right? simply admitting a problem- i am nearly there.
gifts- overdone.
stuff- overdone.
groceries- i can coupon my tail off but still... overdone.  
even if i try and try to NOT buy, i am a sucker for buying, especially clearance/sale items and even if i am on a spending freeze, my smart little psyche tends to talk itself into needing instead of wanting.

case in point: exhibit A- cute little boho flats from Target that i absolutely had to buy because Thursday brought the great shoe debacle of February 12'

but they were darling- cheap- and look startlingly like the new Toms ballet flats. they didn't give a spare pair to a child though so naturally that means i HAVE to purchase an actual pair of Toms ballet flats. crazy how it all works, you know? my mind i mean. side note: have you seen the new "Bobs" shoes? same idea as the not-for-profit Toms, only they are totally for profit for Sketchers... i just can't get on board, maybe if they had picked a more obvious copy-cat name like Zoms or something. anyway, i had made a very poor shoe choice on that faithful thursday morning. actually it was a poor thrifted and adorable boot choice (now i now why they were in that thrift store to begin with) and when my bloodied and cramping feet limped into Target for a few items they whimpered to my eager ears that they couldn't stand and lecture for another three hours that evening without forcing me to dissolve into tears in front of a bunch of college kids who already think i am a loon. so the new shoes were purchased and have joined the ranks with the other happy shoes in my life.

exhibit B- me (yes i took this picture right now sitting at the computer). sad, sad me without a thing to wear tonight.

if it was not our once monthly "broke weekend" i would be running right out to look for something new. we have to go to a banquet with one of my husband's athletes tonight but i would like to be a little festive since it is almost valentines day and all and this is probably the closest we will get to a romantic rendezvous. but i'm not running- i'm still sitting because i am almost sorta peaking my head out of the spend too much money closet. but i might stay in here because i like the shoes and there is plenty of space for more. i'll let you know, right after i stop perusing the internet for sales.

you are my sunshine

in case you haven't noticed, it's february! i can't believe that this excuse for a winter is cruising on by and giving us no snow... the dusting of last month does not even count. unless i can be snuggled up on the couch with a blanket watching the flakes fall, it does not count.
but even though i love a good snow i can't help but be thankful for the sunshine and high temps that gave us some days outside this week. the kids were like bottled up crazies let loose (or wait, there is no simile there, they actually WERE bottled up crazies let loose) running around playing on the swingset, with the chalk, in the rocks, moss and dirt, on the porch, with the baseball set, with the bike, on the porch, on the wall, on the steps... they were everywhere!